Hey. So yeah. I guess I'm starting a blog now. I can sit here and and tell you all these fake reasons as to why I started a blog. But I won't. Writers like to say they need a way to express themselves, or they think it may improve their writing skills. That's not me though. I'm going to be honest to the entire two people that I anticipate reading this. I started a blog for 2 reasons. The first was to allow me to complain about shit. There's plenty out there to complain about, and I think my friends are getting sick of my bitching. The second reason is I wanted to be cool and add yet another reason to add to my already extensive list of things to do other then study.
I guess a little background information on me is necessary for any first post. I'm 20 years old and attend Purdue University West Lafayette. I study accounting there and let me tell you, it's extremely exciting. Anyone who doesn't think that sitting in a chair for 10 hours a day staring at an excel spreadsheet cluttered with hundreds of seemingly useless numbers isn't exciting needs to rethink their life.
I'm not going to complain about stupid life problems either. Every little teenager sits on their computer and bitches about how Mike is so hot and Mike is so cool but Mike will never love me because Mike is way too hot for me. Well, fuck Mike! I'm going to talk about assholes on the bus tonight. I ride the bus from my apartment to class and back at least once a day. I don't think anything makes me more angry then getting on the bus and having someone sit in the aisle seat when the window seat is wide open and you are stuck standing. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind standing. It's a 10 minute ride at most. I'm young, and my legs work fine. But when some bitch thinks she's so high and mighty that she can't scoot her stupid blond ass over 2 feet and, god forbid, let some kid she doesn't know sit next to her for 10 minutes on a bus I go nuts.
One time I got on and I was the only person standing. And there was an open seat, but a girl was sitting in the aisle and wouldn't move over. But this girl found it necessary to sit there and stare at me the entire ride home. What was she trying to prove?? If anyone out there is reading this and is a bitch like this, please explain to me what's going through your head, because I seriously am clueless. It took every brain cell in my head to restrain my body from smacking this bitch across the face.
I think the best time though was when I was standing and some girl found it necessary for her Jimmy John's sandwich to have its own seat. I don't know, maybe the sandwich was extremely heavy, or it was leaking Italian dressing through the wrapping (which you really have to be careful of when dealing with Jimmy John's), or maybe she was just a bitch. I'm going to go out on a limb and say it's most likely the last option there... I don't think I'm the only person out there that feels the same way about this issue.
That's it for tonight. I'm tired, and still slightly drunk. However, maybe just to lighten the mood I want to leave on this note. This morning at 2 pm I woke up and went to the bathroom. I unzipped my pants and pulled em down a bit and a mosquito flew out. What's with that?
2 comments:
Mosquitos in your pants? Ewwww......
my dearest timothy,
i now have two regrets in life. The first is that I never saw Paris. The other is that it has taken me over a month to read your blogs. They make me very happy. happier than someone should be about a blog. I can't wait to see you write your own version of the 'Dog Eyes' poem. You should consider yourself lucky that only a mosquito flew out of your pants. There's a veritable ecosystem in my pants...mostly crabs. love, tj
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